It seems like all I am doing is posting when I am frustrated. This will change. With my next post I promise 😉
I’ve told you before that I am going though the Crises (midlife and menopause). I find that I experience so many different emotions – sometimes in the span of a few seconds – leaving me feeling dizzy and not quite as “in control” as I like to be.
One minute I love my husband to the moon and back, and the next I just want to kick him to the moon and back. He is a wonderful, caring man, has a heart of gold. And he puts up with all my shit. What more can I ask for?
But I am. I want the guy that I married 19 years ago, back.
I have a question to everyone who have been married for 20 years or longer….How on earth do you do it?
OK, I lied. I have MANY questions.
How do you stay married for 20 years and more, and not feel like you sometimes could happily strangle the guy? How do you keep the magic? Is the guy you married still the same, or has he changed much more than you anticipated?
How do you stay in love with someone that long? How do you not fall “out” of love? What does it take to stay physically attracted to each other? Just…HOW????
Don’t tell me about love and loyalty, and date-nights and what-not. Because once date night is over, you come home with the same guy, with the same shitty habits. I want something I can work with, not fairy tales.
And before you start throwing daggers – I know we all go through changes, our bodies change, we grow hair in inappropriate places. Everything that was perky and pretty is now…less perky and pretty (matured we call it ;-))
And we get used to all those changes, we become comfortable with it. But he’s changed way beyond what I can cope with right now.
He eats like every meal might be his last. When he eats, it’s such a racket, I swear you can hear him from a mile away. And the food is all over his face. I mean really?! Using a knife and fork is a challenge – there’s more food around the plate than in the plate.
He is constantly in the kitchen – eating sweets, or cookies or something. It seems like he is scared he will die if his mouth is not moving.
And his tongue lolls. Like a dog’s. I swear, I am not making this up.
When we watch movies, his mouth moves as if he’s repeating the actor’s lines.
Even his laugh has changed. He laughs like a deranged person. We are too scared to go to the movies because you can hear him above all else.
The kids are embarrassed by him.
I cannot say when exactly all this started, but I noticed.
It is driving me C R A Z Y.
And because of this he has become so un-sexy, that I can’t get it up anymore. I’m totally off it. I am running out of excuses already! Granted, there might be other reasons for this (such as my M&M’s) but I dunno….surely I should be happy for any sex I get at this age, seeing that I might not be able to get it up without some help in the near future, right?
Is all of this attributable to the M&M’s – my crises? Is this all just me being a shitty person? I am really hating myself for thinking all of this and for being such a mean person.
So what now, I ask you?? Shall I tell him? I don’t want to hurt his feelings. He already thinks I am a shrew, so can you imagine what he will call me after this? Anyway, the boys have already – on numerous occasions – told him about this, but he ignores it.
Is this normal? Has your guy also changed like this?
Am I just full of shit???
H E L P