… a little bit of this, that and a lot more

Get Ogled

Dizzy’s (useless) tips to getting ogled in traffic (after near-hits and mostly misses – I’ve finally figured it out!)

1.Cut your hair

2. Wear a bling shirt

3. Smile – but not too much, you’ll just look easy (by no means do you wanna look easy in traffic)

4. Drive only in two way streets (ensures they have nowhere else to look when coming to a stand-still)

5. Get there during peak hour traffic (see point # 4)

6. Open the windows and the sunroof

7. Play MJ’s music on top volume (seriously, the windows must be vibrating)

8. Wear “The Fly” type sunglasses (i.e. wrap-arounds, hides a multitude of evils)

9. Wear pink lip gloss (the shinier, the better)

10. Don’t drive too fast – make sure they get a good gander at you

11. Ignore the abuse hurled at you because you’re still playing MJ music

12. Wear 6” heels. Okay, no one will notice, but you will feel fab while sitting there being ogled

13. Don’t get upset when the snoek-bekke & pap-visse also ogle – they are human too

14. Resist the urge to get out and look if there’s something wrong with the car – there’s nothing wrong and there’s NO WAY they are looking at the car. It’s all YOU, babe 😉

You guys have been holding out on me. All this time I thought there was something wrong with me!

Have an awesome day

MWAH!!

PS: has ANYONE EVEN NOTICED I’ve been quiet? *listens to resounding silence*

I mean REALLY?! No-one? Pffftttt. Bloggers. All fickle people.

*mutters to self while shaking head in utter disappointment*

IF any you were wondering….I’m actually working. For a change. 😉

xxxx

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Comments on: "Get Ogled" (14)

  1. one-eye-only said:

    Why, just the other day I said to everyone “Where’s Dizz?”

  2. Killakat said:

    LOL! Nice try Si, don’t buy it for a minute! 😉

  3. Aladin said:

    2 days does not constitute quiet (last previous blog)I should write a blog about what is nice to look at in a woman. Oh and you can never be too friendly I think anyways. And those that take it the wrong way are just dumb. Smile mmmmm I like easy so bring it on Babe!!

  4. isabel said:

    Well done on making the decisin Dizzy! Now you can only go forward 🙂

  5. JoDay said:

    Honey… LeftoverMash has been so fickle lately, I’m surprised ANYONE is even still posting or commenting. :-(Good tips, BTW! ;-D x

  6. pinkpolkadot said:

    Great one, Dizzy!!! I will remember this!

  7. pinkpolkadot said:

    Great one, Dizzy!!! I will remember this!

  8. Mahesi said:

    Hi there Diz, you don’t know how many times i came here yesterday looking for you **evil eye**LOL @ 13 and LeftoverMash!!

  9. shongololo said:

    no wonder!! you should be illegal, much more dangerous than talking on cellphones 😛

  10. JournoJen said:

    You got it going on galfriend!! Of course, you will have the jealous bitches and ho-ho-ho’s sneering at you but it’s all because they have no class and know you don’t have to try too hard 🙂

  11. Killakat said:

    We have those kinds here? Oh dear, need to sharpen my sword then 😉

  12. hemmingway said:

    lol….good one

  13. PaulNicholas said:

    ha ha ha, So it’s all wiles and tricks, is it?

  14. Killakat said:

    Why you have to twist EVERYTHING around? ;)Men are so difficult, i give up

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