… a little bit of this, that and a lot more


This was not a planned post. This was precipitated by someone else….

“I take you to be my lawfully wedded wife/husband, to honour and obey, to have and to hold, in sickness and health, for richer for poorer, from this day forward to the end of our lives”

What utter rubbish. Why do we allow ourselves to be caught in this trap? As so many have discovered, it is NEVER to kingdom come (aka Forever and Ever). Is till “When I tire of you” or “When I find someone younger & richer” or “when I fall out of love with youor because you are not good enough for me anymore.

Then you are told to Feck off. And where does that leave you? Your self esteem is shattered. It takes you years to get over the disappointment. You don’t trust anymore. You are scared to love. Why? Because one dickhead wasn’t serious when he/she made that commitment.

Or maybe he/she was? At the time. So they changed their friggin’ minds halfway through year 10 and decides, “this is not for me, I’m not happy, you don’t satisfy me anymore, you are not the man/woman I married”. Still doesn’t make it right.

A commitment/relationship/marriage is a bloody commitment. It’s not like a bloody pair of shoes that you can return when you decide you don’t want/like it anymore. If the trouble comes through the front door, sit your partner down and FFS’s work the problem out. You don’t leave via the effing back door. And don’t leave it for when the other party is already down and out. Be a fucking (worthy) human being FFS’s. Fucking hell.

Are we fickle/spoilt?
Why do we do this to other people?
Do we have a low boredom threshold?
Or is it just wanting the unattainable?
Can’t we just be happy with what we have and make the relationship we have work?

For others, it’s different. When he/she starts abusing you or the kids (moers you / sexually). Get out. Don’t stay. Don’t waste another minute of your or your kids life with such scum.

But it takes years to make that decision. Why? Because we are scared to be alone? Or financially you cannot make it on your own. So you stick it out until you kill him/her or he/she kills you or your child. Then its probably already too late.

WHY WHY WHY? Is there really no alternative to the misery you’re being put through?

My solution – just don’t do it. Live together. Fornicate like rabbits. Fornicate with others if it makes you both happy. For as long as you both want.

When you feel like getting out, get out, no strings attached. Everybody happy.


Comments on: "WHY WHY WHY 2" (23)

  1. borrel said:

    lmao chomma, that is encouraging when you consider that i am nearly married! lol.I like the humping for as long as you want part though:)

  2. Killakat said:

    Sorry Bumble. Didn’t mean to discourage you :-))

  3. Killakat said:

    Oh Cindy, you always make me laugh. I am a wee bit…;-)

  4. samsung1 said:

    I agree with u Dizzy,if it was “meant ” to be it will be a happy and enjoyable relationship without the “marriage contract”!

  5. Killakat said:

    I think so too. A commitment is mos a commitment?

  6. Luvvit said:

    I think that the biggest relationship buster is that people change, and not at the same rate. One may grow spiritually whilst the other is stuck being a victim. It could make life excruciating to live with someone like that. However, you have a very good point – hopefully the “younger” generation realise that marriage is a lot like damn hard work…

  7. Killakat said:

    Like scrubbing floors on your hands and knees everyday for the rest of your life…;-)

  8. Same shit different day said:

    Diz, who’s stoking your fire on a Tuesday morning ?

  9. shaynix said:

    Ah Dizzy, you have hit the nail on the head. As to your solution – only in a perfect world….There are just no guarantees – ever

  10. Killakat said:

    That idjut….all of them, in fact 😉

  11. Killakat said:

    Ag Bloggsie, tend to take things a bit personally…tx for the offer…might just take u up on it 🙂

  12. Killakat said:

    I know. Would like to try out my own solution tho’ 😉

  13. Killakat said:

    VoxPop….at least you got out. Good for you!!

  14. JournoJen said:

    Hmmm agree 1000%!! Marriage is such a big darn step. I cry when I see my friends and the like getting married at 21/22/23. I have no idea who I am yet so how the hell would I be able to make someone else happy as well! I may be living in sin but at least I am not breaking a promise to God. I take that very seriously! Hope you feel better soon.

  15. colleen_figg said:

    READ MY BLOG OF YESTERDAY ON WHAT CAUSES PROBOEMS IN RELATIONSHIPS/Ur suggestion of not marrying will nt work because a commitment is expected whether you have a piece of paper or not, and the same will be felt when person exits stage right, after ten years of living together as after ten years of marriage. relationships essentialy, are fucked up.

  16. Bek n Call Girl said:

    What can I say… It took me 3 years to leave the sperm donor, AND after the gun pointed at my children and I, he took a contract (YES YES YES it is possible) out on my life, AND (YIKES) I WENT BACK FOR MORE!!!!! Thank goodness for my boy getting me out of that frame of mind (just don’t breed like rabbits see)

  17. Killakat said:

    Coll, my solution is way too simplistic for such a complex problem…

  18. Killakat said:

    I got married at that young age too….it was too young, I didn’t know what I wanted…

  19. Killakat said:

    O my word Eliza. I though things like this only happened in our culture! You should tell me more when you have time…

  20. ianv66 said:

    Life has become very complicated, but i agree with you, live together.

  21. pixie24 said:

    Most off my friends are divorced … Iv’e learnt from them! Thanks for the advise Dizzy!! Hope you are well!

  22. Ashleigh_Rose said:

    I think our attitude towards relatioinships and commitments reflects our attitude towards life in general. We’re all after instant gratification and quick fixes. Most of us are fickle and get bored easily, and relationships have become disposable and easily replaceable.

  23. feefy said:

    Hope that you feel better today Dizzy

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