This was not a planned post. This was precipitated by someone else….
“I take you to be my lawfully wedded wife/husband, to honour and obey, to have and to hold, in sickness and health, for richer for poorer, from this day forward to the end of our lives”
What utter rubbish. Why do we allow ourselves to be caught in this trap? As so many have discovered, it is NEVER to kingdom come (aka Forever and Ever). Is till “When I tire of you” or “When I find someone younger & richer” or “when I fall out of love with you” or “because you are not good enough for me anymore“.
Then you are told to Feck off. And where does that leave you? Your self esteem is shattered. It takes you years to get over the disappointment. You don’t trust anymore. You are scared to love. Why? Because one dickhead wasn’t serious when he/she made that commitment.
Or maybe he/she was? At the time. So they changed their friggin’ minds halfway through year 10 and decides, “this is not for me, I’m not happy, you don’t satisfy me anymore, you are not the man/woman I married”. Still doesn’t make it right.
A commitment/relationship/marriage is a bloody commitment. It’s not like a bloody pair of shoes that you can return when you decide you don’t want/like it anymore. If the trouble comes through the front door, sit your partner down and FFS’s work the problem out. You don’t leave via the effing back door. And don’t leave it for when the other party is already down and out. Be a fucking (worthy) human being FFS’s. Fucking hell.
Are we fickle/spoilt?
Why do we do this to other people?
Do we have a low boredom threshold?
Or is it just wanting the unattainable?
Can’t we just be happy with what we have and make the relationship we have work?
For others, it’s different. When he/she starts abusing you or the kids (moers you / sexually). Get out. Don’t stay. Don’t waste another minute of your or your kids life with such scum.
But it takes years to make that decision. Why? Because we are scared to be alone? Or financially you cannot make it on your own. So you stick it out until you kill him/her or he/she kills you or your child. Then its probably already too late.
WHY WHY WHY? Is there really no alternative to the misery you’re being put through?
My solution – just don’t do it. Live together. Fornicate like rabbits. Fornicate with others if it makes you both happy. For as long as you both want.
When you feel like getting out, get out, no strings attached. Everybody happy.